Wishes(Reaches)

Tis the season to become greedy. Just Kidding! but really...

Normally, I can immediately create a christmas list containing things that I have coveted for months, but this year is different. I feel that I don't need anything. This year and in general I have been so blessed with multiple material and non-material things. This holiday season I am focusing on the true reason for the season (I know, cliche) and praising God for every gift I have been given in this life here on earth. 

With that being said, I did end up creating a list of reach items that I would would love to invest in. My family was continually hounding me to create a list so this is the result of the hounding. 

1.  2.  3.  4.  5.  6.  7.  8.

1. I love rings and trees. This is the perfect combo of the two.
2. Walking around campus is frigid. This vest over a sweatshirt would be a nice solution to the cold.
3. I LOVE my jams. Bose speakers would bring my dorm room to life.
4. I have the boots, I want the sock inserts.
5. Lulu yogas. These shall perpetuate my procrastination by making watching American Horror Story much more comfortable.
6. I like the color and jackets.
7. I like glitter, it likes me.
8. I would feel like a badass in this jacket.

You're Beautiful

Hi Everyone,
Today I have been reminded, countless times, of the reason that I am on this earth. The song lyrics below have been stuck in my head all day and I think that they are just so beautiful. I can't wait for the day that I get to see my creator and thank Him for all that he has done for me. I encourage you to read the lyrics and listen to the song. Phil paints a beautiful picture and the song makes me so excited for the future. 


You're Beautiful- Phil Wickham

I see Your face in every sunrise
The colors of the morning are inside Your eyes
The world awakens in the light of the day
I look up to the sky and say 
You’re beautiful

I see Your power in the moonlit night
Where planets are in motion and galaxies are bright
We are amazed in the light of the stars
It’s all proclaiming who You are
You’re beautiful, You're beautiful

I see you there hanging on a tree
You bled and then you died and then you rose again for me
Now you are sitting on Your heavenly throne
Soon we will be coming home
You’re beautiful, you're beautiful

When we arrive at eternity’s shore
Where death is just a memory and tears are no more
We’ll enter in as the wedding bells ring 
Your bride will come together and we’ll sing
You’re beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful

I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful
I see Your face, You're beautiful, You're beautiful, You're beautiful
I see Your face, I see Your face
I see Your face, You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful, You’re beautiful

Weird.

I am weird in society's eyes.
I am okay with being 176 lbs.
I am not embarrassed by my skin complexion.
I am fine with acting like a grown woman sometimes, even though I am 19.
I strive to be the "perfect A student".
I am okay with having a few close friends.
I am an introvert.

The last two things that I listed have been sitting heavy on my heart. I have just finished my first quarter at my university and I have learned ALOT on the way. I especially learned a lot about myself.

Over the course of my childhood I have kept a few close friends and then help my distance with tons of acquaintances. I have had no problem with talking to people in structured atmospheres (i.e. work, school, church, etc.) but I am not good with furthering those friendships out side of those situations. And in the past I have been fine with that, I have lived by the people who I could turn to and I whole heartedly threw myself into what I was preoccupied with doing (school, church...). But, now at school I occasionally see myself as a loaner because all of my "close friends" are at home. This has caused me to be a bit more out going but also self reflect a lot. I have realize after hours of reflection that I might be weird in societies eyes but I am beautiful in my Lords. I am able to have connections and conversations with my acquaintances. And might I add I have a TON of acquaintances. My introvertedness makes it difficult for me to just go out and make friends but I have to remember to trust the Lord and only fear his judgement. For He is greater than all earthly things. Oh! And being an introvert isn't a bad thing...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQH2U-kmBdY

Happy as What?!

A short story told by All-i Rose.

Today in my Communication 101 mass lecture my professor asked for 4 volunteers from the crowed to be brave enough to come and help her. There are 300 students in this class the the most charismatic and outgoing students were the first to respond. I didn't recognize the first volunteer, but I knew the other three. They were my friends Josh, Brady, and Skylar. As those boys started to walk down the steps to the stage the lecture hall eroded in laughter. I didn't know why at first, until I noticed Skylar's shirt. In big, bold letters were the words "HAPPY AS FUCK!" Naturally, I just lost it.
My professor said, "Oh dear god," while looking at Skylar.
He asked, "What?" not remembering what he was wearing.
"It's your shirt young man."
"Oh... crap." He tried to cover it with his hands, "Should I turn it inside out?"
"No, no... I am sure that we have all seen that word."
Skylar just continued to beam his confident white smile as the crowd continued to loose it.
That was the highlight of my day.

Here is a picture where I was "HAPPY AS FUCK!"

-All-i

Hmmm...

The further I go into my education here at university the less educated I feel. Tonight, I have been struggling with what I believe and I have realized how submissive I am to knowledge. I never question authority and now that I am of the age where I make my decisions and I am my own authority I don't know what to believe. There have been a few things this week that have made me feel this way:

1. The Election. My school is extremely liberal. I am fairly conservative. I believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinions and should not be ridiculed for their decisions. Last night I did not feel welcomed or respected. 
2. I also thought that gossip would be left behind in high school. Apparently not. This last week my next door neighbor decided to engage in some promiscuous behavior. That is normal. It's college.    The problem was that she did not do it on her own bed, she did it on her roommates... She won't admit to it and says that she cannot remember because she was too drunk. Her roommate has come to me for advice because she feels violated. I feel bad for the girl who made a few decisions that I don't  agree with, this weekend. She now has a stigma attached with her name throughout my whole floor. Why can't we just respect each other and mind our own business? 
3. I am feeling sort of out of place on this campus. I feel that I have to change how I act and what I believe to fit in, and that is not okay. I found myself lying a lot this week about little things to protect my name and who I am. I wish that I would have the courage be myself. 

I just want to find the Lord and his righteousness on this campus. I feel that I am trying to do EVERYTHING on my own and it is because I won't give anything up to Him. Lord, take my burdens. 

None of that made sense. 

Sorry.

A very confused,

Alli

What's been on my heart

I am growing up and the older I get the less I seem to know about myself and life. When I was 5 my greatest worry was whether Aaron, my brother, would find out that I went through his room. Now I am taxed with the ongoing worry of what I will do with my life once I complete college. I have financial worries with how I will pay for my education. I worry whether I am doing everything "right." I wonder who God has intended me to be and how I can devote my life to him 100 percent in all I do.

Today, my family came up and visited me. I was so excited to see them. This last week, I have been focusing on the little things and how blessed I am to have been given this amazing life. I got in a fight with my father because of somethings he was telling people about me. I sternly told him to back off and I could tell that I had hurt his feelings. Today, when he arrived with my mom he was cold and distant. It turn my heart. I felt that I was a burden to him for making him come up here when we were not on completely good terms. I tried to be warm and show him how much I loved him. After they left my heart ached. I didn't know why. I felt empty and numb. I realized what a big part of my life they are and I don't want any disconnect with him.

I feel that this can represent the Lord and my's relationship. I reprimanded my father for his actions because they were not just and they, I felt, were doing more harm than good. The Lord does the same to me. He is not my father in this scenario, he is me. I am my father. I try to do good and in my actions I hurt my Holy Father, just as my father did to me. When the Lord reprimands me I tend to back away and stray from his discipline. I must realize that he does not do this out of anger, but love. He wants me to grow and strive to become the best Alli that I can be. I pray that my father will come to realize that I will always love him and that I only rectified the situation to strengthen our bond and grow together.

My anxiety has seemed to have fled me for the moment, thank God! But, I still have a numbness/void that I am trying to fill. I have a lot of trouble submitting my worries and struggles to the Lord. That is something that I have to put more effort into. I need to trust and pray. For David says, in Psalm 139, "1O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. 2You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I am far away." He knows me! Every part of me. He loves me and He goes before and after me. He protects me. "7I can never escape your spirit! I can never get away from your presents!" I am made perfect in your image. I cannot change my being. I need to be content with my own beauty created by you. "14Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex. Your workmanship is marvelous- how well I know it." So my prayer is, "23Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. 24 Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life."

Today is going to be a good day

I don't know why, but it is.
I woke up at 7 am without complaint.
I was able to drop Abbey off at the train station.
I then attempted a new route to the Starbucks at Seahome Plaza and I made it.
I have had my first Skinny Peppermint Mocha of the Holiday Season.
I am now sitting in Starbucks, enjoying my Mocha before I head to a woman's event at the church.
I am excited because my family is coming to visit me tomorrow.
I feel optimistic about my future.
I am not stressing about all I have to get done because I know that I will do it eventually.
I am blessed.
Life is good and I am going to enjoy that this morning.

Thankful,
All-i Rose

A Story

My english professor is 26 years old. He is fit and attractive. 

Today right as our 5 minute break ended the boy that I like asked out of the blue, 

"Kelly, do you have a girl friend?"

Kelly responded promptly with, "No, she broke up with me this weekend. That's why I didn't grade your papers. I was a little preoccupied." 

His face was sullen and his posture slumped. 

I just started laughing and so did everyone else. 

The guy who asked apologized. 

Poor Kelly.

I just wanted to write...

Today I just wanted to write. My classes were cancelled and I had fabulous intentions of accomplishing things that were due in the future, but unfortunately that was not fully executed. I just got in a weird tired funk where it was hard to accomplish things. I was so tired that when I ordered a sandwich for lunch I couldn’t remember what an olive way called… I proceeded to explain to the sandwich artist that, “I [wanted] those little black thingies.” Yes, that is exactly what I said. It just slowly became one of those days. I wasn’t moody or upset but I wasn’t excited or overly happy. I was kind of numb.

I thought that calling someone from home would cheer me up or at least help me gain a little bit more energy so I called my best friend, Jim. He was surprised to hear from me and not to enthusiastic. I asked him about how their Halloween went and how life was and his response was not too enthusiastic. He then out of the blue asked me, “Alli is there a boy in your life?” Now, let me rewind.

I want there to be a boy, but nothing has happened yet. A few weeks ago in my English class I had to peer review this boys paper and he had to peer review mine. I was extremely intimidated by him because he is beautiful and extremely smart. He is also a few years older than me. I did not want to hear what he would have to say about my paper because I thought that there couldn’t be anything positive in it. But when I got it back I was pleasantly surprised. He had begun the paper with, “My dearest Alli” and then he elegantly wrote the changes that he recommended. He was quite kind and I really appreciated it. Then I met up with my church group the next week to walk to church and he was there. I didn’t say anything to him because I didn’t think he would remember me but he did! He purposefully made his way up to me and initiated a conversation with me. Then he sat behind me during the church service and as I left he sought me out to say goodbye. I probably read into it too much, but I was smitten.

Fast forward, so when I went home last weekend I briefly mentioned that story to my mother and thought nothing of it. Well, apparently word had gotten out at home. I guess my mother told my father briefly that I was talking to a boy and then my father proceeded to tell the whole town that I had been dating a boy for 2 weeks… WHAT THE DEUCE?? That caused my blood to boil and I became icy during my phone call with Jim. I quickly terminated my phone call with Jim and then called my mother to ask her what she told father. That phone call didn’t make me too happy either. And in the middle of that phone call Jim called me back to make sure I was okay. Anyway, moral of the story is that I have to be VERY cautious with who I share things with.

After that I went to an ethics panel, dinner and then I ran home to read some before my bible study. Right was I sat down there was a nock on my door. It was a girl on my floor who has been having some problems with her roommate and she needed someone to listen, and naturally I was there. I knew that that was what the Lord wanted me to do was just listen. After our conversation I ran to bible study, read my English, and then showered. Now I am here. Writing. I hope that tomorrow I get a little bit more pep in my step.

 More later,

Alli Rose

Who do I want to be?

School is hard. I thought it would be tough, but I don't think I expected it to be this difficult. Let me justify why I think it is so hard. I have a little problem.... I hate not doing something perfectly the first time. I also compare myself to others far too much. I am frustrated with college because I cannot do everything perfect the first time. Last week I had to write 3 papers, take 2 exams that were 1/3 of my grade, and had a team speech. The papers were not up to grading par. I got a D on one of the exams where everyone else who I helped study got B's. And my speech was a little rocky because my group dropped the ball and I had to pick up the slack; which in return lowered my grade. And this week is no different. So after several tearful phone calls to me mother. Whoops! Apparently I am a pirate now. Anyway, it made me think about what really matters in life. Next year, will it really matter if I failed a test or got a B on a paper. No. The relationships that I make this year will though. The character that is built overtime. The lives I have impacted. So I am going to break down who I want to work on becoming.

Shay Carl once said, "It's not about finding out who you are, it's about creating who you are..."

And then today on Facebook Colette Butler, Shay's wife, posted this...

Who do I want to be?

• I want to be friendly.
• I want to be accepting.
• I want to be open to new perspectives.
• I want to be independent.
• I want to help others.
• I want to make people laugh.
• I want to eventually be a mother.
• I want to be educated.
• I want to be positive.
• I want people to know that I care. 
• I want to live for God. 
• I want to be loved.

This list will grow. And I hope I do too.

I am off to study so I can better myself.

That is all for now,

Allison

My purpose...

Yesterday was a lazy day. My roommate had gone home for the weekend so I had the room to myself. I work up early made coffee and then sat in my warm bed watching Gilmore Girls for a few hours. After the marathon I buckled down wrote a paper, read some sociology and then met with a friend for coffee. I returned to my room to study for the rest of the evening to study for a few upcoming tests. It was so nice just having a  laxidasical day where I had no solid plans and I was content with being by myself. But as the evening went on I started to feel a bit of discontentment in my heart. Everyone around me had plans which led me to realize that I don't have too many friends up here. Just as I was starting to feeling that way I received a text from my friend asking what my plans were. I texted her telling her to come to my room so we could watch a movie. As she was walking over another girl from my floor stopped by my room and invited me to a girls night. Now looking back at that moment I can see that God was so alive right then. He could see the discontentment in my heart and directed the right people to me. Unfortunately at that moment I just felt like I was a looser and I knew that it was up to me to make friends but right then I didn't want to have any part in being social. 

Today, looking back on that experience and analyzing my feelings, I have come to a few conclusions. 

1. I only have a few friend and A LOT of aquantinces. And that is okay. 
2. The friends that I do have mean a lot to me.
3. I read too much into relationships. 
4. I miss my friends at home. 
5. I don't have the energy to be social or the knowledge on how to be.
6. Having friends shouldn't be for my benefit it should be theirs. I have to be a servant to the Lord and put others first. 

Number 6 was the big one. I realized that I was feeling lame because I didn't have friends but in all reality I need to put the lord and others first. I need to make them feel good about them selves before I can feel good about myself. Having friends is nice and good but more important than that is my service to the Lord. And while I am serving the Lord I can meet people and possible create more friendships.

Just thinking,
All-i

Things I have learned so far in college

I have been living on the college campus for 11 days now and I feel like I really have been getting the hang of things. This is some of the stuff that I have learned so far...

1. Sleep is a not a optional.
2. People are generally really nice.
3. It is okay to be weird.
4. Text books are expensive.
5. College food is NOTHING special.
6. When you get the opportunity to dance, take it! And if you get the privilege to crowd surf enjoy every moment of it.
7. It is weird if you are normal.
8. Get plugged in somewhere.
9. Be honest!
10. Don't ever give your number to a drunk man.
11. Make tons of lists.
12. You have to study a lot.
13. There is a large population of african american squirrels that live on campus. 
14. Coffee is a necessity... I instantly regret it when I don't make it. 
15. There is ALOT of free time. Use it wisely.
16. Take chances and put yourself out there. 
17. Don't do Zumba and then eat a panini... ask Gail about that one. 
18. Reading sucks.
19. It is hard to poop. Find a generally quite time to make your break, like when people are in class or in the wee hours of the morning.
20. Meet people whenever you get the chance.
21. Don't break the seal...
22. Have a good conversation starter in your room.
23. Enjoy every minute of it!!

I am loving it so far!

-All-i

Hope

That saying has been constantly on my mind for the past few days. I am officially a college student now(just warning you all now, my grammar will not improve in these blogs because I honestly don't care). I moved in to my residence hall two days ago, and I am finally starting to get the lay of the law. Last night I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and really made an effort to get to know people and try new things. I am positive that I am not the only one who is nervous and insecure here and I realized that I should just be myself and meet as many people as possible so that they would feel included and loved. I tried to share Jesus's love to all last night. I ventured to the Ridge and joined in on different hall meetings, I ate dinner with a new group, I painted bricks with my hall, my RA and I ran to the Rec. center to workout and play games, I watched the Hawks win against the Packers with a new group, and  finally my roommate and I went to Fred Meyer at midnight to do some food shopping. I was defiantly exhausted by the end of it but I was also very proud of myself! I know that it is up to me to create how successful I am in this experience and that I have to make an effort. I know that it will not always be easy though! Yesterday morning was very difficult... I woke up at 7 am and layer in bed until 8:30 am. Now, you have to learn one thing about me. I cannot spend too much time on my own with nothing todo because my mind wanders to these pessimistic outcomes. So while I was laying in bed I was thinking about how alone I was, how I would have to spend 4 years here, and how much I will miss life at home. The life at home piece was the one that I tended to fixate on. I was extremely comfortable with where I was in my life at home. I had a fantastic family/home life. My parents were there to support me and my brothers were only a half an hour drive away. I loved where I worked and the Youth Group its self. I think that the youth group idea was the hardest one. I know that my mom is only  a phone call away so that is a bit more reassuring, but there is something about the group moving on without me that is difficult to understand. That group has been such a huge part of my life for so long. It gave me a purpose and it was my passion and I knew I was loved there. It is hard for me to look at pictures of the group because it makes me realize how much I love and miss them all but... I have to remember that that is the Lord's group and that it is not about me there. I will always be able to return there and hangout with them, but I also have to realize that it is time for me to fly and grow as my own person. I have to learn what my passions are and what I want to do and more importantly I need to figure out what the Lord's plan is for me. I am hoping that college will help me learn more about myself and that it will also help me gain a more positive attitude towards life. 

My RA had this verse posted on her wall and I LOVED it! 

Hebrews 12:1-2 "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off everything that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let is run with endurance the race God had set before us. We so this by keeping out eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of this joy awaiting him, he endures the cross, disregarding shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God's throne." 

I have to strip the negative thoughts and anything that is holding me back from personal growth and my love for Jesus Christ. 

-All-i

I've been taking life too seriously...

This past summer has been filled with anxieties, "what ifs". Fears about school, the future, my career, financial situations and much more. I tumbled into a depression which caused me to return to seeing my psychologist. I wanted to find the big answers to life, like what is its purpose? Why am I here? What am I destined to do the rest of my life?

I leave for school in 5 days and in the last two days I have realized that I don't have to have all of the answers. I just need to live in the moment and experience EVERYTHING that I can while I am still at home, and them when I am at school I need to experience all that that has to offer too. I have always liked things planned out and structured, but during the past few days I believe that the Lord is just telling me to take a breath. I need to enjoy the last few moments I have with my best friends back at home that I will miss while I am away. I have to look positively to the future and feel excitement for what is about to come.

My grandpa sent me an adorable letter today. He could tell that I was a little apprehensive about next attending school in a few days and he gave me some very sound advice. Let me tell you first that I am someone who resents change and failure with my whole heart. It terrifies me to be put in a situation where there is a potential for failure. His letter basically said experience EVERY moment of school. Take risks and put myself out there for everything because I have nothing to lose. He is the kindest, wisest man I know and his advice resinated within my heart.

So I am encouraging you to go out and experience life one breath at a time. Go on a walk and admire all of the flowers. Tell the people who you love that you love them. Sing in the shower. Do what makes your heart jump!

Lots of Love,
All-i

The Beatitudes

"When your country and mine shall get together on the teachings laid down by Christ in this Sermon on the Mount, we shall have solved the problems not only of our countries but those of the whole world." - Gandhi


Those are big words... solving the world's problems and misunderstandings. Living in harmony. No more war. A world filled with hope, joy and peace. Gandhi understood the power of Jesus' sermon on the mountainside in Galilee which was talked about in Matthew 5-7. Crowds from Galilee, the Decapolis, Jerusalem, Judea and the region across Jordan gathered as Jesus sat up top of the mount surrounded by his disciples. Jesus began his sermon with eight Beatitudes.

1. The poor in spirit will receive their spirit/hope from heaven
2. Those who morn will be comforted
3. The meek will inherit the Earth
4. Those who hunger and thirst for righteousness will be fulfilled
5. The merciful will be shown mercy
6. Those who are pure in heart will see God
7. The peacemakers will be called sons of God
8. Those who are persecuted because of righteousness fill find theirs in the kingdom of heaven

And Jesus ends the topic of the beatitudes by saying, "11. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kind of evil against you because of me. 12. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you." He lets us know that living for him will not be easy, we will have to deal with doubters and prosecutors. He also promises us the glory of heaven. 

Over the next few days I hope to tackle breaking down the Sermon on the Mount peace by peace.

-All-i

The little things.

Today I was reminded that the little things in life are the ones that usually matter the most. A little kid hug, a smile, a question asked at the opportune moment these are all things that can turn my day around in an instant.

My day started this morning at 7 am. I quickly got ready and scurried out the door to run to a new church for the 8 am service. The service was magnificent. The Lord spoke to me in all aspects of worship; singing, prayer and through the message. My favorite part of the service was the congregation.  I was raised Presbyterian so there is no hang raising or singing to loud but at this new church there are no limits. The whole congregation's voices echoed off of the walls while hands were reading up to heaven. Everyone was so genuine with their love and worship. I was so inspired with the male population of the church! They were humble and so vocal about their love and it made me desire a man who had that kind of passion. 

From church service #1 I ventured to church service #2 at my home church. I listened to my best friend deliver the word of God to the elderly population of my home town. The Lord was present at the instance as well. I worked in-between services #2 and #3 recruiting golfers for our golf tournament fundraiser. I had many pleasant conversations and brief moment catch ups but, I had this overwhelming feeling of sadness/remorse that washed over me all at once. I realized that I only have one more Sunday service with all of these people before I leave for a year. That church population is my family and it breaks my heart knowing that I will not see them every week. As I tried to shake my mood I prayed a prayer of comfort. I knew that I kneaded to find a peace and a bit of hope that would let me know it is okay. Right after I prayed that prayer Jefferson Bethke posted this on Facebook, "Don't let anyone steal your joy today. If you got Jesus you got everything." After reading that there was a sense of calm that overwhelmed me. 

I was walking back from the office to the sanctuary for service #3 when I ran into my youth pastor's wife and 4 beautiful daughters. The two youngest ran up to me and gave me the tightest little kid hugs. Then the littlest one, Taylor, grabbed my hand with one of hers and walked with me into the sanctuary to find my seat. She stood in front of me and I wrapped my arms around her as we entered into worship. I prayed that the Lord would open my heart to receive his direction and that I would have no limitations as I worshiped. Then I sang, I sang with all of my heart and so did the whole congregation. I was AMAZED the whole congregation in unison were singing praises to our savior. I was overwhelmed in that moment. Tears came rom nowhere and I hugged Taylor with all of my might and she rested her head on my shoulder. 

After the service I continued to recruit golfers and a mom who's daughter is a part of our youth ministry sauntered over to me and asked me how I was heeling about school and aced for my address. She reassured me that everything would be okay and that she would be there for me at any moment. Then Taylor's sister Riley ran over to me and gave me a big hug and told me that she would miss me next year and then later in her father's office he said the same thing. Jesus showed me that I will not be alone next year and that there are plenty people who are back at home praying for me. 

I am so thankful that the Lord directed me to this church and allowed me to meet these people. I owe so much to MPC Student Ministries for supporting me over the past 7 years and I hope to spend a lifetime giving back. 

Here are some pictures of the precious Taylor(pink) and adorable Riley(white). 

 

This is the newest promo video that I created for MPC Student Ministries.

Loving the little things,

All-i

Festivities

This weekend is my favorite Mukilteo weekend. It is the great Mukilteo Lighthouse Festival! Parades, fudge carving, beer gardens, fireworks, and friends are just a few nuggets that bring me joy. Tonight is the beginning of the festivities down on the water front. There will be food and community gatherings.

Tomorrow is what I am pumped up for. I will break up bright and early for the parades. I will pass out water courtesy of Windermere. When I was but the wee age of 5 I would walk in the children's parades with my chocolate lab, Cocoa. Then the following day I would dress up as a clown with my parents company to pass out balloons. We now have transitioned out of the clown state and balloons to just passing chilled bottles of water. After the parade I will trudge down to the beach in hopes of meeting up with my friends. We will indulge in delicious delicacies and saunter up and down the beach a multitude of times. Then at the end of the evening we will all sit in a heap at the beach and watch the firework show.

It is the little things that bring my heart joy. I hope you are all doing will and I pray that any pain of discomfort, whether it is emotional or physical, will be relinquished/comforted by the Lord.

Talk to ya soon,
All-i Rose

Here is photo of us last year at the festival.

I am 19...

Wow! That sounds weird. I am a 19 year old human being. Jeez I am getting to be a geezer! Just Kidding, kinda.

Today I am going to share 19 little nuggets of wisdom that I have learned during my last 19 years. Enjoy!

1. Being kind never hurts anyone.
2. Use your blinker.
3. Family means everything.
4. You must walk before you can run.
5. Life is hard, but, we are not alone on this journey.
6. As a family you must stick together. Through the good and the bad...
7. The Lord loves you with all of his heart. You were create perfect in his eyes and he longs for a relationship with you. 
8. Lasting relationships take lots of work.
9. It doesn't hurt to take chances.
10. You must love one another with great compassion and you must also be willing to forgive one another.
11. Ask questions and a lot of them.
12. You can do ANYTHING that you set your mind to.
13. Dance as often as possible. It will cure any sadness you may be experiencing.
14. You only have to please yourself.
15. Finances will always be a burden.
16. Cherish the relationships that you make and tell people that you love them, often.
17. Everyone is going through some sort of shit. Most people are not public about their burdens.
18. You have to make a change to see a change.
19. Be weird. Don't  be afraid to be yourself. Don't change who you are to "fit in". You will fit in with your own group if you are who you create yourself to be. 

My brothers and I last year on my birthday. 

We were at my brother Aaron's(blue shirt) wedding rehearsal dinner.

Now I am off to celebrate my day of birth! Love you all and dance a little today... for me:)

-All-i Rose

Responsibilities

In 1 hour and 45 minutes I will officially be 19 years old. I don't know how I feel about it. Last year when I turned 18, an official adult, I didn't feel any different. But, this year, 19, I feel like an adult. I am now aware of the many responsibilities I will have next year, and each year older I get the more responsibilities I will retain. I don't like that... The last 18 years I have been raised in a safe bubble. My finances were paid by my parents. And everything I ever really needed was handed to me. I am not aware that that is not how real life is and that scares me, ALOT!

Yesterday, I couldn't sit and be still. I was mulling over the same thoughts that would bring me to an uncomfortable state of thought. The main questions that I was pondering were:

1. What is the point of being here?
2. How can I make a difference in this world?
3. What will I do for a career?
4. How will I be able to financially support myself in the future?
5. What does the Lord want me to do all about this?

And that last question cleared a lot up for me. The lord doesn't want me to know all of the answers. If I knew all of the answers I would not need him. The only thing that I can do is rely and trust in him. He will provide. He doesn't let his followers go hungry. My primary worry at that moment should have been how my spiritual heath was. Last night, around, 11 pm, I decided to do something. I decided that I needed a change of venue to possibly feel a push from the Lord, or at lease get a little bit of guidance from new individuals who are united with me through Christ. So I looked up the hours of a new church. And then I set my alarm and fell asleep.

This morning I work up at 7 am sharp to go to New Life Four Square Church, and I loved it! It was just what I needed in that moment. The worship music was straight from my heart and the lyrics matched exactly what I was thinking. The pastor was relevant and I was able to follow and retain all that he said. The people were friendly and it gave me hope with having the strength to find a new church next year. After the New Life service I went to Starbuck and read Acts or an hour while sipping on my Skinny Caramel Macchiato. Then at 11 am I went to my regular church service and felt at home. 

The Lord made me realize today that in all I do I must do it for him. If I do that and worship and praise him and most importantly if I proclaim him as my lord and savior, he will direct me and guide me. There is so much in store for me in the future. Each year, as I get older, I must just praise the Lord and thank him for the opportunity to share his gospel and love to this broken world.

Lots on my mind, 

Alli

Love

If there is one this that I believe the Lord wanted us to do as humans, on this earth, working for him, it is to love. Love one another, love his creation, love his direction, and love ourselves. That is one commandment that I know is true and that I have the power to execute. I read Romans again lost night and Chapter 12 stood out to me. Verse 9 starts with a direct request, "Love must be sincere." God creates each one of his children to be perfect in his eyes. There are plenty people in this world that have the ability to drive me crazy but, I have to have the power to embrace them and their "flaws"(in my eyes).

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above your selves."-verse 12. We must put each other in a pedestal, never above the Lord, but above ourselves. If some one asks you to do something, DO IT! Show them you care and expect nothing out of it. Show your gratitude when someone does something for you, even if it is the smallest of things. And when someone offers to do something for you, allow them to do it. If you deny them you are taking away the joy that they would receive from following the Lord's commandment.

The verse that hit me the most related to mission work. Specifically to a trip I took last April. 20 of us flew to San Francisco to work with the homeless in the Tenderloin District. The Lord was alive and well dwelling with in all of our hearts. It was a joy to have the opportunity to interact with the homeless and give them a little love. Most of the homeless population are lonely and seeking some sort of love or attention. Verse 13 says, "Practice hospitality." Then verses 16-20 say, "Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of love position. Do not be conceited.... If your enemy is hungry, feed them; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." We are the some as the homeless population. Our lives might be a little less exciting but they have the same soul and maker as we do. The Lord gravitated to the broken and the hurt. He loved them with all of his heart because he was the only person that could fix them and they needed his forgiveness and love. We have to be like Chris in that sense. We have to love and care about everyone we interact with. That is what Christ would do. I will post a few pictures of the group in San Fran and a video of our free time. I was not able to get any pictures of the homeless so these will have to suffice.

 

The Crew on the first night

Enjoying their In-n-Out hats.

The ever so lovely Brad and Neal.

Quayln Ray.

Rosies...

 Bran and Quyaln

Hendo

Jim and I

Kelthy Hovith

Gavin and Henderson

Here is the video.

Love you all,
All-i Rose

Transition Space

I am in a transition period. In less than thirty days my life will be dramatically different. Next Wednesday my school district will be going to school with out me. I will be working up until my departure to the University. I love my limbo period when my mind is occupied but when my mind has time to wonder it cam be very dangerous. I am a very pessimistic person by my nature. I told my friend a few days ago, "If you expect the worst out of something or someone you can never be disappointed." Which I guess in some instances that is okay but, on the other hand, then what would you have to look forward to in life.

This summer I have been questioning the reason that I am on this Earth. What do I have to offer? What can I do? The past 18 years I never questioned my purpose and I looked forward to the little things. That was because my life at that point was pre-planned out. I was going to be an A student, who volunteered, and what going to graduate from high school. But now I am to the point that it is my life and I am in control of my earthly self. The Lord has a plan, but I can choose to live his way or my way. So what are some small things that I am looking forward to in this next month.

1. My birthday. I am going to be 19! It doesn't seem like my birthday yet though so I am not too excited. 
2. The Mukilteo Festival! I love this weekend. The parade. The carnival. The food. The friends. The fireworks. 
3. Fall Kick-Off. This will be the last time that I will be with the whole YG before I head off to school.
4. The Golf Tournament. I love interacting with everyone. 
5. I am kinda looking forward to moving in and getting to know everyone. Kinda...

-All-i