A New Me

Change can be gradual and change can be immediate. Change can be hard and change can be easy. But the one thing that I know about change is that it is in God's will and that I learn from every second of it. These past 5 years have been filled with change and (I never thought that I would say this, but...) I am very thankful for it.

There has been financial, geographical, relational and family, emotional, and physical changes. My physical change is one of the most predominant changes that outsiders can see.

I have always been overweight according to the doctors standards. Growing up I was the "plus sized" girl. One time one of my friend's mothers took us shopping and on our way to Old Navy the mother asked me, "Alli, do they cary your size here? I know that when people are your size it can be a bit difficult." Seriously?! At that time I was a frustrated 7th grader who was already struggling with identity and body image issues, why did she have to focus on my body shape. So my summer before sophomore year I decided that I wanted to embark on a journey of creating a healthier lifestyle.

On August 12th of 2009 I stepped on a scale and snagged my starting weight for this weight loss journey. My weight was at the highest it had ever been, 212.7 lbs. I was a 5' 9" girl with a BMI of 31.5 (very overweight). I started my new lifestyle with just changing the food that I was consuming. My goal was to loose between .5-2 lbs a week until I reached 175 lbs.

The journey was slow and frustrating at times, but it was also exciting and rewarding too. I remember one time, I was about 6 months into my weightless pursuit, I was in the grocery store picking up some grubb and I ran into a man who worked with my father. I called out his name and he just looked my me with a puzzled face so I introduced myself. He was in shock of my body transformation and asked how I did it. It was the best feeling knowing that my transformation was making process.

It has almost been 4 years sense I have shed the weight and I am now around 178 lbs, and BMI of 26.5. (still overweight but only by 1lb). I have a new sense of, not only confidence, but health. I am able to do so much more now! I am not 100% okay with my body, but I am getting there. If I can do it you can too!


Grace and Peace,
All-i Rose

Friends

I leave back for college on Monday and I am filled with mixed feelings. I love my time in Muk-Town. I have friends who I feel comfortable to be 100% myself around. My family is close by and I can be at my church almost everyday. At school I haven't found my group yet and classes are hard, but I like meeting people in my classes and learning more about myself.

I guess I am feeling extremely nostalgic this evening. I think that these past 8 months I have been focusing on what I am loosing instead of what I have been gaining... I feel that I am loosing my connection with people at home when I am gone instead of realizing that I am maintaining those friendships and gaining new ones at school. This next quarter I am going to try to focus on the positives  that occur in my life and attempt to continue to be myself and give myself the benefit of the doubt. I am constantly too hard on myself. I focus on my faults and continually question my actions. This break has made me realize, after some self reflection, that I am a decent person if I have been able to make the connections with people here that I have. I need to continue to spread God's love, and with his direction I will discover my group and grow as a person.

Here's to creating new relationships,

Alli

Friends

Let me introduce you to one of my best friends. His name is, Jim. I have know Jim for 8 years. He was my youth pastor at my local church. Jim has greatly impacted my life in many ways, and I am so thankful that the Lord introduced us. 

Jim, two of the interns and I went to Pike Place Market today for a day trip. It was my "after break/send off back to school" celebration. We used to go every year from 6th grade to 12th to the market and water front, but this year I could go. I was at the University. In 2009 Jim, my friend Jesse, and I took a picture on the pig and today we recreated it.

We have changed a lot between those 4 years, but one thing that stayed the same over those 4 years of our friendship. It has grown stronger, and one thing that I know is that we will always be friends. We have tons of crazy stories, maybe one day I will share some with you. But for now I want to just say thank you to God for introducing me to such great people.

Happy, 

All-i

LIFE UPDATE

Today, I cut my hair. I was so sick of taking care of all 25 inches of it each day, so I cut it off. Now the problem is... I don't know if I like it. I miss the long locks that took for ever to style. I feel less feminine.  I guess that I just need to look at the change as, new year new look. Tell me what you think. I am off to continue to find unique ways to styling my hair. 

Byeeeeeee!
-All-i Rose

Changes

I made the resolution, for this new year, that I would blog once a week in hopes of keeping my mind somewhat sound/sane while I am back at school. I have been sitting at my desk trying to think of a topic for today's blog, and nothing is coming to mind. NOTHING! This is the reason that I made blogging and journaling once a week a resolution, because I get so many thoughts jumbled in my mind that they can become hard to process. When blogger's block occurs I think that I will just start by talking about current events that will lead to deeper thought.

Today, my 89 year-old grandmother was moved into a "home". She has been battling Alzheimer's Disease for the past seven years and in 2012 her condition elevated to the level that my grandfather could no longer properly provide care for her and take time to care for himself as he battled prostate cancer. My grandfather and grandmother have been married for almost 65 years and their love is possibly the strongest love that I have seen between a couple. Their love is the way that it is because Christ is centered in their lives and relationship. Because of this strong love, my grandfather has struggled with the process of letting part of her go so she can live away from him. We keep reminding him that part of her isn't their anymore and that he needs todo what is best for both of them and that is giving up the care portion of her life to professionals. I pray that one day I will find love like their's. I also pray that I will never have to make my husband make that decision to let me go also. I will most likely become like my grandmother in my old age and I hope to let my future lover know that when I get to that state I will not resent him for moving me. Their are so many unexplainable things in this world, but we have to trust that their is a reason for it all.

Here is a monologue that I had to perform for my english class senior year about this disease.

Grace and Peace,

Alli