Creating lasting friendships.

Let me start off by saying that, I am not the most outgoing individual when it comes to meeting new people. I have a hard time initiating conversation with strangers and then turning it into something more that just a friendly conversation. That is partly because I am extremely self conscious and I do not want to be judged. So with that being said, this year, going into school, I was terrified. I feared being lonely and becoming an outcast. I spent hours in prayer, asking the Lord for His direction and peace. And after this year, I can proudly and humble say that I have created solid and lasting relationships with some wonderful girls.

For any of you who seem to have the same difficulty with creating initial friendships here are a few tips that will hopefully give you some peace of mind with making friends in a new place.

1. This might be extremely obvious, but... spend time with people. For me, I had the initial fear of giving too much of myself, and then our friendship not working out. Go somewhere together and talk. Don't be afraid of empty words. There will be those time and that is when you can reflect on the conversation and the other person's actions. Watch T.V. together, go on a walk, hangout with a group. Time is what helps flourish friendships.
2. Find friendship in groups. For me I got to know my friends through mutual friends and now we are just one be 15 girl friend circle that does almost everything together. Try to find the balance with hanging out with people one on one and being in groups. 
3. Be available to help and support. So many of my friendships started be cause someone needed me. Whether it was me helping someone study, loft a bed, or just listen to them talk. I was available and placed myself in situations where I would listen.
4. Be yourself. I was nervous to do this initially because I am WEIRD. Initially, I think that I tried to mask my weirdness if that is even possible, but it's not. Stand up for what you believe in even if it not something that the other person agrees with, just don't be invasive about it. All of my friendships have gotten stronger because of am honestly myself and my weirdness just radiates off of me. 
5. Don't talk about anyone behind their back. Just don't. It creates copious amounts of doubt in other's minds. 
6. Tell your friends that you like them and that you care. That sounds stupid but people like hearing that they are validated.
7. For some rare reason someone doesn't like you, don't worry. There will be those people, but don't fixate on them. Focus on the friendships that you do have pour your heart into them. 

My friends have been so important to me this year and I am so thankful for everyone of them and all that they individually bring into my life.

 

 

Thankful,