Thursday, February 28, 2013

Leaps Of Faith

Where to begin...
This spring break I will be returning to work at the church. I am so excited to be back and round all of my friends. We will be adding the finishing touches to our San Francisco mission trip. Here is where I can start to talk about this leap of faith.

When we first planned this trip it was going to be during my spring break, but then we realized that we were going to be gone during Easter the possibly most important Christian holiday around. So we moved it... to my first week of spring quarter classes. MAN! Has that caused me stress. I am such a planner and with this abrupt change in plans I automatically closed myself off to the idea of skipping my classes and going. I told my boss that it would be impossible for me to skip my classes because it would add too much stress. Logical right? I wanted to stay on top of my studies. My social standing is of the up most importance right?

Part of me still longed to travel with the group. Jim kept asking, is there anyway that you can go? Like anyway? And my response was no, until I dreamed up the idea of going for half of the trip and only missing two days of classes. Jim agreed that that would work and that he would be glad to arrange a separate flight for me.

Over time as the trip has gotten closer I have continually kept feeling this tinge of discontent into my heart. I internally longed in my heart to travel with my group to San Francisco for the whole time. So I started to pray, A LOT! My biggest fear was that I was desiring to go for myself and my own personal gain, not for the Lord's glory.

One evening I was talking to my mother, honestly, with where I was and what I was thinking. She basically ended up saying, go. If you feel it in your heart, take that risk and go the whole time. So, I emailed Jim and asked if I could go for the whole trip. He responded, yes.

So it was official, I was going the whole trip! But it sure made my tummy feel a bit unsettled. I think that I was concerned with my studies and the fact that this whole thing was out of my hands. I still couldn't tell if I wanted to go just so I could be with my friends or if it was for the Lord's glory. I was feeling guilty about missing school and fearful that I might be giving up a portion of my  education. For some reason I felt selfish.

This past week, though, I have had a new thought on my mind and an unusually sense of peace in my heart. I am realizing that this is a big leap of faith for me. I know that this is in God's hands and if I am doing it for His' glory than everything will work out in his perfect plan. This trip has caused me to have to humble myself, and really focus on my purpose of being on this earth. I am here to live for the Lord and show other's Christ's love, and this trip is exactly that. It is an opportunity to be a servant. I am ready for that and I know that God is going to teach me so many things throughout this trip. I can't wait to see what he has in store for us.

Here are some pictures from our trip last year to San Francisco.

Too excited and so thankful,
All-i